Black Dating Guide: Things to Know and Tips in 2023

Black dating information and website reviews

Black dating sites truly exist and this is obviously catered to black men and women to get a chance to meet despite their busy lifestyles. It can be challenging to meet someone who you are compatible with. But with black dating sites today, everything will be a breeze.

What are Black Dating Sites?

Black dating sites are just like any other sites, but this specifically caters to black people who are also into the same race. With the busy lifestyles that we all have, it can be challenging to find a date and create a long-term relationship. But with the technology’s innovation, nothing is impossible. All you have to do is to look for a black dating site that you would like to join in and sign up. You may opt to choose a free one or a paid one; the only difference is the features that are available in each of the sites.

If you are unsure whether you can deal with online dating, then joining free black dating sites would be best. In this way, you can explore everything that the site has to offer, without spending a dime. Now, once you figure out that dating sites are the one for you, then you may decide to upgrade and join in paid dating sites are stay with the free one, because either way, you will surely get to meet someone.

Here are our top picks for dating sites:

elitesingles review 5 Star Dating Review Largest active member base of working Black singles. Free to try!

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Tips on Dating a Black Woman

Not all black women are the same, but it would be best to not portray yourself as someone who is above them. The reason behind this is because the majority of black women today are strong and pretending to be someone you’re not won’t lead you anywhere. They are very smart, and they will undoubtedly uncover the truth in no time. So it would be wise to ensure that everything you do and say will match and are all true.

Most black women are not looking for someone with whom they can be with for just a short period. They prefer to date and build a long-term relationship with someone they honestly trust. They are not into games so always make sure that ones you commit with them, you will stay true to the relationship and her.

It Can Be Intimidating

Yes, let’s just all admit it and accept the fact that dating a black woman can be intimidating. Maybe not everyone can get intimidated, but if you are someone who has issues in the past, including your self-image, self-confidence, and insecurities, then leave that all behind. A black woman needs her man to have an inner game that is pretty solid. Another reason why men, white men, in particular, get intimidated is that they feel like they need to compete with black men. The truth is, you don’t have to. If she agreed to date you, that means merely that he is interested in you and not some black man.

Feeling intimidated is fine, you need to accept this kind of feeling. But don’t dwell on it too much, as this will only ruin the date. She will also see you as someone who is weak, and you surely don’t want that to happen.

Be Honest

Dating a Black Woman

Of course, being honest should always be on top of your priority. You still need to be realistic not only about yourself but your feelings as well. Majority of black women who are in their 30s to 40s said that honesty is what makes perfect men. Being honest means being open about your real intentions. For instance, if you are just looking for a companion or let alone, a hookup, then you should be honest about this. Of course, if you are looking for someone with whom you want to be with for a long time, then you should also be honest. In this way, both of you will know if the feeling is mutual.

Be Fun

Everyone wants to laugh and to make your black woman laugh the best thing that you can. Make her laugh and make sure that the date will turn out fun and fine. Sense of humor is your ticket to her heart. Having a sense of humor can help you get a woman’s entire attention. Always remember that it is not all about the money or your status in life. Having a sense of humor is also an important trait.

It’s Not About Money

Dating a Black Woman

Black women don’t care about your money or any of your properties. They can very much support themselves on their own. To avoid being too flashy, because it will be a huge turn-off. The best thing that you can do is to impress them with your character and patience. Always put in mind that money can be gone, but your characteristics will stay for a lifetime.

Give Them Freedom

As mentioned above, black women are independent. This means that giving them the freedom that they need is beneficial. They always love it when their men provide them with space. Avoid controlling this kind of women, as this can only cause problems and such. By giving her the freedom that she needs, you will be giving her the time to be refreshed and to refocus her life. If you try to control her, you might end up pushing her away.

Avoid Self-Pity

One of the things that black women and women from other races hate is a man who does self-pity. Some men will try to play the victim, telling their stories about their past relationships. They will start telling you how sorry they are for themselves for experiencing that kind of problems. Black women don’t need to hear these things. Be in control of your emotions and act like a desperate man. Show her that you can man up and be the man of her dreams.

Show Her The Real You

Now, as mentioned earlier. It would be best, to be honest, and typically, honesty is not all about being true to her. It is also about being true to yourself. Avoid pretending to be someone that you are not. Show her the real you, and if she accepts you for you, then there won’t be any problem at all.

Be Consistent

Dating a Black Woman

Lastly, consistency is the key to every successful relationship. Black women love consistency just like any other race does. Be consistent in everything that you do and everything that you say. Always remember that news can travel very fast. And the moment she finds out about your secrets that can ruin the relationship, then her guards will be up. You will surely have a hard time earning her trust again. Worse, you may not even get that trust back.

First Impressions

In case you haven’t figured this out yet, first impressions are always essential in every date. So it would be best to wear something nice on your dates. Your outfit for the date will give a long lasting impression so ensuring that you are well dressed would be best. Of course, you don’t have to wear a tuxedo on the first date. But showing that you shaved and showered would be enough. Preparing your physical appearance up to your outfit would be best, to make yourself look presentable. Once you have achieved this, all you have to worry next is to turn up on time.

Plan the Date

You need to plan the date on your own, especially during the first date. You need to bring her somewhere comfortable. The place should be suitable for you and your date. The reason why you’re the one who needs to plan everything is that a black woman would like to see that you have the ability to take control. Plus, it would be nice to meet in a place that you are both familiar with. This will both help you to feel comfortable.

Just a heads up, it would be best to avoid places where you and your friends hang out. As their presence may distract you, in case, they are in the same place as you are. You surely don’t want to get distracted while you are on a date.

Show Confidence

Black women like it when their men are confident with themselves. If you are someone who is a little timid, then it would be best to practice being not before the date. You can start by doing small talks with other people. Also, it would be best for you to know some of the topics that you are enthusiastic about so you have something to talk about. Show her your confidence by talking about that subject enthusiastically. If you don’t have the body of someone who is like that of a bodybuilder, it actually won’t matter. What will matter is that you are comfortable and happy with who you are.

Let Her Talk

Of course, it would be wise to not show too much confidence by talking nonstop. Let your date talk, and if you are going to comment, you can keep it concise and short. Talking too much might bore your date, and you surely don’t want that to happen. Now once the topic has run down, you can ask specific questions that are date related. Just always make sure not listen to whatever she is saying. This will show her that you are interested in her.

Keep It Fun

You need to keep the date and the conversation fun. Avoid talking about topics that are negative and are depressing. The topics should be light-hearted and not about how you hate waking up early in the morning to go to the job that you don’t like. Whatever issues you have, you need to keep it to yourself, especially on the first date. Black women and women, in general, like it when the guy can make them genuinely laugh and ask questions that are appropriate. Of course, you need to be serious at times especially if required.

No Talking About The ‘Ex”

It will be wise to not talk about the ex of neither of you. This is one of the topics that are not good to talk about. By all means, it would be best to stay away from any conversations involving your ex or her ex. But if she brings up the topic, then you can just keep your answers short. Sometimes, women brought this up to ensure that you have already moved on. The best thing that you can do is to reassure her that you are a hundred percent sure that you have already moved on.

No Phones

Dating A Black Woman

While you are on a  date, it would be best to turn your phone off or at least put it on silent. You are on a date, and you don’t want to annoy her with your phone ringing nonstop. If possible, turning the phone off completely would be best. This will surely help avoid any distractions whatsoever. Your date will surely appreciate it that you are talking to her and taking the time to get to know her with your full attention.

Always Offer to Pay

Lastly, even if it is already the 21st Century, it still is a nice gesture to offer to pay the bill. Women will offer to pay for their share, but it would be best to turn that down. But if she is persistent, you can just tell her that she can pay the bill on the next date.

Rules When Dating a Black Woman

Start Being Open-Minded

Dating a Black Woman

Always remember that race will still come up when it comes to interracial relationships. But by all means, you need to avoid complimenting a black woman and then adding her race. For instance, you can avoid saying “You’re well-spoken for a black woman.” This may sound like you are complimenting her. But it will look like you are insulting the majority of black women today.

Complimenting her like that will only make her think that you are just the same with the others who stereotype black women. As you all know, they don’t get the same treatment with their counterparts. The reason behind this is because their skin color is often associated with negativity. So that best thing that you can do is just to say “You’re well-spoken” or “You’re pretty.”

Be Yourself

Dating a Black Woman

You may have read or heard about this somewhere else, but being yourself is your ticket to having a significant date. You don’t need to pretend to be someone that you are not. Just like women of other races, black women don’t like it when a person acts to be someone else. Always remember that if you are lying because you are nervous, black women also feels the same. They face scrutiny and hostility all over the world, and they also feel nervous when they start dating someone out of their race.

Some men like pretending to be someone they are not because they thought that they impress the woman. You surely don’t want the woman to do the same to you. So the best thing that you can do is to be yourself. Get to know each other and appreciate each other’s versatility.

Accept Them As People

As you all know, some people see themselves as the ones who are superior. And more often than not, black women are seen as the ones who are below. So when I say accept them as people, this just means that you need to accept them for who they are. Always put in mind that just like anybody else, black women have different obstacles, backgrounds, and as well as interests.

The black woman that you are dating is not a person who speaks for her entire race. Just like you, you don’t speak for the entire white men and women. So think of them as a person just like how you want people to think about you.

Appreciating Their Sexuality

Dating a Black Woman

A lot of men are dating black women because of their weird fetishes. Some men are quantifying these women, and they always expect them to follow the practices to certain stereotypes. Some men even bragged about having a black woman like it is a trophy. Stop expecting them to get promiscuous, angry or do certain things that you see in movies. You also need to stop making them look like someone who is mysterious, elusive, and exotic because they are not.

If you are thinking of them that way, you might just get disappointed once you get to know the black woman that you are dating. The best thing that you can do is to treat them like anybody else. As mentioned above, accepting them like anybody else would be great. They are also ordinary people who have different thoughts, passions, values, and abilities.

Have Fun

Lastly, once you get to sit down and have dinner with a black woman, the only thing left for you to do is to have fun. Enjoy your date and make sure that she’s enjoying too. You can start talking about your life or your hobbies, and you can ask her questions. Just make sure to listen to her when it’s her turn to speak. This will help you to have an idea of what question to ask her next. Make a date as fun and memorable as possible, especially if you want this date to have a second one and a third one and so on and so forth.

Scams on Black Dating Sites

Just like on any other dating sites, there are also scams on black dating sites. Typically this happened when a user starts to register and join on a particular website without checking them out first. The reason behind this is because there are a lot of scammers who are spending a lot of time just to create an almost similar dating sites just to fool people into joining. Once they join, they will steal not only their identities but as well as their private information including their finances. This is more common on paid black dating sites because people will have to enter their credit card details, and from their, these scammers will start stealing and using that information for their gain.

One of the ways to avoid getting victimized is to check’s list. The site reviews and check dating websites, including black dating sites. Once the site is proven to be a scam, they will flag it down as one and include it on their list of scam dating websites. Of course, they will also include a list of legitimate sites where you can join and not worry about getting scammed.

If you are ready to join a scam-free dating site with a dedicated black population, check the sites below:

elitesingles review 5 Star Dating Review Largest active member base of working Black singles. Free to try!

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eharmony is a great dating site 5 Star Dating Review #1 Dating Site. Largest active Black singles member base. Free to try!

Try Now

Black Dating Site Reviews

chelsea king - chief editor of romancescams
Written by Chelsea King

Chelsea has been a direct victim of romance scams herself losing over $35,000 in a span of a year in 2015. She joined and took over operations of in 2015. She brings first-hand experience in studying romance scams, and also experience in vetting dating sites for legitimacy. Read more of Chelsea's articles.